Skip to main content

Narcissistic victim bully complex

Blog 3: Tirza Scheffer

Narcissistic victim bully complex

I found a video talks about the Narcissistic Victim Bully Complex, where someone acts like both the victim and the bully to manipulate others. These people change the story to get sympathy, making it look like they are always the ones being treated unfairly, when really they are the ones causing harm. It's even worse when only you see them being mean, while everyone else believes they are the victim. They get all the support, and you end up looking like the bad person.

One of the most harmful tricks they use is the classic "I'm just joking" excuse. It puts you in a difficult position: either you laugh at your own embarrassment to stay "fun", or you call them out and suddenly you're "too sensitive" or "no fun". This is how they keep control, they make you doubt your own feelings while they continue to manipulate the situation.

The woman in the video explains why it's so important to recognize these behaviors and set boundaries. It's easy to get caught up in their little games. I met a girl who was exactly like this, and she always acted like I was in the wrong or stupid. I was quite young when I was in touch with this 'friend', but I soon realized that I wasn't the problem. It's important to trust your instincts and look after your own health.

References:

DoctorRamani. (2022). The narcissist’s victim-bully complex [Video]. YouTube. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FRbmsQ3WW_4

Doct

Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Brian Giner and PDA Bullying platform

  Following my last post, where I talked about the documentary Acoso Escolar from ARTE.tv, I caught my attention the figure of Brian Giner, so I decided to look into his book Golpeado pero no derrotado It’s a work for all ages in which he shares his personal experience during his school years. The author emphasizes that the book isn’t just meant for students, but also for parents and professors. Through his story, he hopes to raise awareness about the importance of taking action in cases of bullying. Apart from publishing his book, he also gives talks on bullying prevention to students in the first to third years of ESO in catalan high schools. Based on his own experience, Brian aims to shed light on cases like his so that victims don’t feel alone and can see an example of resilience. While researching his book, I came across a very interesting platform called PDA Bullying . It’s a collaborative initiative involving various institutions aimed at promoting best practices for the...
Post a Comment
Read more

Salutogenic approach and a personal opinion

  As I briefly mentioned in my previous post, on the website called PDA Bullying , among various resources, there is a section dedicated to explain the Salutogenic approach . After doing some research, it becomes clear that this approach gets its name because its main goal is to promote health and well-being . The platform aims to address bullying from this perspective, adopting a strength-based approach that focuses on individuals' potential and the creation of a cooperative community working toward a shared goal . It slightly reminds me of the No Blame Approach we studied in class, as it also refers to a method based on compassion and a solution-focused outlook , rather than assigning blame. Their aim is not simply to act against bullying, but rather to overcome it , moving beyond a simplistic understanding of bullying as just a dynamic between two individuals. Instead, they view it as a broader social process . For this reason, the protocol designed and implemented by...
Post a Comment
Read more

Guidelines for Bullying in German Schools

In Germany, the Ministry of Education published guidelines for schools on how to deal with bullying in schools. The following characteristics identify bullying: Intent to Harm, Repetition, Power Imbalance, and Helplessness. If bullying is detected, they provide teachers with 5 steps to follow. First, they should act immediately. This includes halting any aggressive behavior and ensuring the victim is safe. Also, they are obliged to assess if the already mentioned bullying criteria are met. Then, Teachers and school staff need to discuss the situation with colleagues to decide on the best course of action. This might involve engaging the victim and the bully in separate conversations and determining the next steps. Lastly, the victim should be provided with support to offer a safe school environment again In addition to the teacher guidelines, there are also ones for School Leadership Teams. First, they have to ensure that anti-bullying policies are being followed. This includes suppor...
Post a Comment
Read more